Sneaking away in the wee hours: Why are we so afraid of leaving?

2022-07-04 0 By

The Lantern Festival has not yet passed, but the atmosphere of the Spring Festival has left only structural meaning.After all, for most workers, the sixth day is the day of struggle again.Like the story of “parents returning to work after the New Year for fear of their children crying and secretly leaving home at midnight” (Bengbu, Anhui province), what may matter is not how hard it is to leave, but the long years of watching behind it.The mother explains the scene:”Because of my husband and I are working in zhejiang, factory drives to work, chose to walk in the evening, afraid walk children crying during the day, evening walk should be a little bit better, later I also phoned her mother-in-law, finally the child was crying, cry for more than an hour, have been screaming for mom and dad, had listened to the in the mind is very sad, said not to come out feeling, but can’t,That’s life.”After all, without the mother’s explanatory words, it would be easy to romanticize the scene of parents returning to work after the New Year and sneaking out at dawn to avoid crying.This is because we tend to assume that they are simply afraid to face separation, despite the fact that their parents are migrant workers and their mothers are just like this.In fact, for most people, they tend to be intuitive realists.In this regard, “left-behind children” and “empty nesters” are obviously the result of passivity.Because beyond the picture of “children and children”, it is more about reality: “how to live a better life”, “how to provide for the elderly and support the children”, and “constantly strengthening the material foundation of family life”.Therefore, for the scene of “parents returning to work after the New Year to avoid their children’s crying and secretly leaving home in the early morning”, even if the mother gently turned over the child’s quilt when she left, it gave people a very warm feeling.But in the context of life, such parting is just a choice for a better reunion in the future.Therefore, when we look at the problems of “left-behind children” and “empty-nesters”, we should not rush to accuse the “parents with children”.At the end of the day, who wants to leave their home country when there are better life options?In this way, whether we talk about “left-behind” from the perspective of children or “empty nest” from the perspective of the elderly, if we exclude the moral inaction, it is better to see what it means to “have a child and a child”.Following this line of thought, it is obvious that the core problem reflected in “parents returning to work after the New Year for fear of their children crying and secretly leaving home at dawn” is not the fear of facing parting, but the moment when the parties do not want to see the warmth defeated by reality.Under the realistic order, avoidance becomes the inevitable choice of “preserving warmth”.The reason why “fresh warmth” is emphasized here lies in the fact that parents have different feelings when their children cry directly and avoid crying.Children may feel that their parents are cruel to leave them in their hometown for a long time, but for the parents who leave their hometown, it is more difficult than parting, is the difficult life.Therefore, when it comes to the narrative of life, whether it is media presentation or market speech, it is better to extend it from the level of various situations, rather than always keen to emphasize “original sin”, “empty-nest sorrow”, “original predicament” and other points with torture.Because it is not easy for anyone to return to life itself and the flow of fate.Of course, we also know that the temptation presented by narrative to the expresser tends to dominate the narrative.Like threads piling up in a clothes dryer, misinformation can cling to the narrative itself in bits and pieces, as can half-informed anecdotes and casual utterances.In this regard, we look back to the report of “Parents returning to work after The New Year to avoid their children crying and secretly leaving home at dawn”, which itself is still attached to the Spring Festival people back and forth on the prelude, but from a larger perspective overlooking the small mood changes.This makes people cannot help but bring themselves into the established picture of separation.So between wind comments, will overflow the sound of the same feeling.Therefore, “we are always afraid of facing parting” is only a reinforcement of psychological suggestion in a specific situation. In essence, people’s core appeal is still to hope for “a better future for everyone”.However, for “better future for everyone”, it is still a simple game of fate after all, because for most people, the basic idea of exploring fate is still “dedicating to the present and enjoying the future”, while for those who regard “living in the present” as the criterion, there are still only a few.